eine Woche noch. . .

I have come to accept the fact that I will be moving on from this place, but I don't think it has yet to really truly sink in that at this time in one week, I will be in the air flying west. I think my mind is tricking me into thinking that it's just for a vacation or holiday, but it's not. I am in fact moving back to the United States in a week. That is absolutely crazy. I have lived the last 14 months away from everyone and everything I have ever known to go pursue an adventure. My time spent here will be time that I will look back on fondly with great memories and amazement. I don't think I will truly grasp the idea that I won't be waking up to seeing Emilian or Lisa or Kai anymore, until after at least a month or two back home. I am going to miss them so much. I can't even begin to think of how much little Emiliano will grow by the next time I get the chance to see him (which will hopefully be this coming summer). And I can't really even think of not seeing Bertus yet. Granted, I haven't been able to see him pretty much at all in the past 6 weeks because of his work, but the idea of him being so far away will be odd. These people have become my best friends and family in the past year, and I am so thankful that fate would have it that we would come into each others lives. But when I start to become sad, I then think of how exciting it is to be looking forward to being surrounded by my American family and friends--the people that have known me for years, and who I always feel at home with. And of course, don't even get me started on my dogs ;)

One week. It's going to be an emotional roller coaster in these next several days, that's for sure. But then again, I think I am going to be too focused trying to figure out how in the HELL I am going to get all this stuff home without having to spend a million dollars. So I send my apologizes now to the poor sap that will be sat next to me on the plane, because I have a feeling, that will be the time that all these emotions will come pouring out. So, guy sitting next to me in a week: Sorry, my B.

As of right now, it being 1:40pm on Monday, December 13th, I have exactly 6 days, 17 hours and 20 minutes left in Deutschland. Ugh. I'm going to be a wreck.

Coming Home

So I have to int interrupt my retelling of my Vegas adventures to post about a big decision I have made in the past week. In the past few months I have becoming more and more unhappy around here. Don't get me wrong, I love my host family and living in Germany, but as time went on, I found myself missing my family and friends more and more and not to mention I felt that I had lost some of my independence and a little bit of myself. Bertus and I weren't able to see each other in weeks because he was so busy with work in Mainz and that put a big strain on both of us--especially him. Last Sunday (Dec. 5th), he let me know that he was unhappy with a lot of things, and although it was sad and upsetting for sure, it's something that I knew deep down would always have to happen--to officially break up. I was trying so hard to want to love being here so much more because of him, but knew that my true place is to be laughing with family and friends surrounding me, and that for me is found at home in the US. But in reality, I am grateful for him to have been brave enough to confront the situation and bring up the end, because I never would have, and without the end of us, I would never 100% convince myself to return home. I have no ill feelings toward him or anger whatsoever. He was my best friend here and I had the best year with him. Honestly, there is no way I think I would have made it this long without him. And for that I thank him, and I expect him and I will remain good friends for the rest of our lives. And who knows, maybe someday our paths will cross again--and I fully expect him to visit Ohio at some point and finally meet everyone!!! :) ..so Bertus, if you're reading this, start saving money now!

So with that, the decision was easy. It is time for me to come home. It is sad, and I know I will be upset when I am forced to officially say my goodbyes to Kai and Lisa and Johanna and of course little Emilian, but at the same time, I am bursting at the seams with happiness at the thought of being home again. I've loved my time here and will remember it for the rest of my life, but I belong in the US. So, America, I'm coming home. I had a flight scheduled to come home for Christmas for 9 days, leaving Germany on the 20th and coming back on the 29th. But with this new change of plans, I will be flying home, and just staying. Everything has been coming so fast, for I now leave Germany in a week. A WEEK! I fly from Düsseldorf at 7am to Paris, then catch another plane to Charlotte, NC, where I once more change planes and arrive to Port Columbus International Airport at around 7:30pm EST. And from there I set out on my next life adventure--with all my favorite supporting cast of characters around me.

So everyone back home reading this, you have one week to choreograph and rehearse the following for my arrival. I look forward to seeing everyone soon! All my love, Megan